To those who love these books - a large part of my frustration with them arises from my conviction that this guy could do this well, but isn't bothering. I suppose if I leave a sufficiently long gap between reading these books I might actually finish them someday, but right now I am sufficiently pissed off at Shepherd to consider never going back to them. On the global level, the story is poorly organized to an astounding degree; on the line by line level -- the man's grammar is atrocious! I'm not talking about the "electronic transcription artifacts" that readers of eliterature are learning to take in stride; the guy is purely illiterate to the point that I wonder if English is his first language. Or perhaps he is just careless and completely indifferent to his readers.
I have said several times in comments on these that they were space opera and it wasn't logical to expect great literary merit from space opera; although, I believe I lambasted another of his, not one of the Kris books (although I believe it was the one where he slipped and called his heroine "Kris" at one point), and suggested that they may have actually been written by an eleven year old with learning disabilities. Still there are appropriate standards for space opera - I don't expect careful foreshadowing and significant social commentary. On the other hand, I do expect a coherent, fast- paced story. A story which should be direct and clearly narrated, no need for symbolism or even character development, it may rely entirely on plot - because it is space opera. This does require of the writer that have a story and tell it. In this one, a full twenty percent of the print according to the running percentage counter on my kindle is wasted on one incredibly boring space battle. Minute by minute from every point of view and nobody, but nobody is as stupid as the Admiral and governor-to-be of the evil Peterwald clan - unless they are confined in a secure facility for their own protection. I turned pages (clicked page forward) very, very quickly. I decided I really didn't care.
He had enough event for two, even three stories, and ended up with a pointless hodgepodge. We open with our heroine accused of sundry crimes and at the point of trial and incarceration - in fact her whole family has been attacked - Dad (the prime minister) has lost a vote of no confidence in parliament; greatgranddad (the king) is unable to act because the interim government doesn't like him; grandpa (the industrial tycoon) is still making money. So little Kris is packed off to calm a planet wavering between joining the alliance of whatever and going with the evil empire. The story on that world would have made pretty good (if silly) space opera if removed from its setting in the middle of pointless crises back home.
When Kris returns from Hawaii (I forget the name of the planet - Hakili, or something - but it is patterned on Hawaii as the western missionaries found it back in the eighteenth century, i.e. before muumuus), the original crisis is all forgotten, except for having to work around tiresomely inept governmental idiocy. I guess Shepherd cooked up the temporary removal of the Longknife clan to create the situation which the evil empire is exploiting. The interim Wardhaven prime minister and his cabinet of bobble-head dolls have been tricked into sending the entire fleet away, so the evil empire can send in a troop of monster ships to bomb the planet back into the stone age - thus wiping out the Longknife clan and rendering the planet useless for thousands of years. Which kept me wondering what the governor-to-be was supposed to govern when all was said and done.
To no one's surprise, I am sure, Kris cobbles together a "fleet" and sallies forth to face monster battleships with her ragtag bunch of volunteers. Take your pick of analogies "In the manner of the Polish cavalry riding out to face the German panzer divisions" or "like the civilians who took their rowboats and crossed the English channel to evacuate the troops pinned down on the French seacoast at Dunkirk." Of course, the Germans never figured out that the rowboats were coming until the deed was done, and the Polish cavalry was completely wiped out. So, with enormous courage and individual acts of personal sacrifice -- and, of course, devastating loss of life, David prevails against Goliath and the world is saved. And of Kris's little bunch only one was killed - one whose wedding to another of her little band occupied much of the earlier parts of the book. He has been wearing a red shirt for a couple of books now. Fortunately, Kris had given him the opportunity to spend a night with his new bride before he was killed.
So much for the garbled excuse for a plot. The grammar issues are another whole realm of horror. The story deals with the elite of this world - royalty, high level politicians, ranking military officers in all branches. And even if a character originated in a mining community with collars as blue as can be, they have at this point been to military academies and universities and learned how to behave in polite society. They don't say things like "don't take it personal" - it is quite possible to get through life without knowing the difference between an adjective and an adverb, but, if you want to hang out with the big guys, you had better use them appropriately instead of inappropriate.
Perhaps like that one deadly dull Dick Francis book, this one was poorly received and he mended his ways hereafter - I don't recall problems of this type in the later books that I read.
I have always tried to avoid saying "Dang, Ah coulda done better mahself," for fear that someone will jump up and say "So go do it already and stop fussing about someone who did." Maybe this time I will procrastinate for fear that I might actually do as he as done. Although, given calibre of the people that read and correct and comment on everything I write, I think it unlikely that I could get away with it.
No comments:
Post a Comment